Even a fool who keeps silent is considered wise; when he closes his lips, he is deemed intelligent.
I know I like to talk a lot. It used to be so much worse. I would just babble all day long about nothing. I don't really even know what I thought I was accomplishing. But how many examples do I have of regretting what you've said. Too many. I have forgotten specific examples - time is a great healer and eraser, but I do remember that I talked way to much. I've gotten better at listening now. (Answered prayer)
What I think is funny is that even in secular TV or general non-Christian culture, there is an understanding that people who chatter aimlessly are foolish. The silent and reserved, even if seen as prideful or off-putting, are still deemed to be more intelligent then those who can't stop talking.
I think of the book Pride and Prejudice (oh yeah, it relates:]). Specifically there is this scene where Jane Bennett is sick, and Lizzie has come to the house where she is to see her. This house contains Mr. Bingley, Miss Bingley, and Mr. Darcy. Miss Bingley and Mr. Darcy are my focus here. Darcy has already begun to favor Lizzie Bennett and Caroline Bingley is jealous. So in order to keep attention on herself, she just keep saying the silliest things without end. It's actually quite funny to read. Darcy on the other hand, says very little in response to Caroline. In the end, Darcy seems thoughtful whereas Caroline seems silly.
No girl wants to seem silly.
This is why I have tried so hard to control my speech. Praise the Lord that I am improving. I still have a long way to go. I have a strong tendency to speak before thinking. Which is trouble no matter how you look at it.
Lord, I pray that You'd help me control my speech. Help me to say things that are wise and helpful to those around me. Let silly words and useless conversation be far from me. Let the words of my mouth be a blessing to others and bring honor to You. Let me never speak just to fill the silence, but let me always speak with intentions of building up and loving. I pray that You slow my thoughts that I might reflect before blurting things out. Give me the wisdom to improve in this area.
Amen. Amen. Amen.
07 June 2012
06 June 2012
The Poor Man
Whoever oppresses the poor man insults his Maker, but he who is generous to the needy honors Him.
I don't think I've ever gone out and oppressed the poor or cheated them, etc. You probably haven't either. It's not something that normal people just do or even have the power to really do. I'm sure there's room for a political argument here, but I would feel that to be inappropriate and misjudged. One thing that has bothered me recently is my lack of willingness to go out and be with the poor. To help them where they are. To spend time with them in order to share the Gospel with them. I do get caught up in my own life - where I'm going, what I need to be doing, etc. I tend to forget that my life isn't all that important.
For example, I was in Washington DC last week on vacation. I was somewhat overwhelmed by the number of panhandlers there were on the streets. Now I've heard my fair share of stories about these people who make a pretty good living begging for money on the streets. It still bothers me though. I will never just leave money and walk away. That's not what Jesus would have done, so I see no reason to do something so ridiculous. Yet how can I as a young woman stop and talk to a somewhat shadey man on the side of the road. But how can I just do nothing? Evidently it's quite easy, because nothing is exactly what I did. I walked right past all of those people. What would they say about my God if they knew I was a Christian?
This is why it gets to me. As Christians, we aren't called to do much. But some of the big things are to spread the Good News and care for the widows, orphans, and the needy. Granted you can't always tell what someone is truly in need of, but you can't just assume they are lying.
So what am I supposed to do? I know places to go, things to do, people to work with in order to achieve this commission. But I'm busy. Oh I don't have time this week. No, I can't go alone. Excuses, Excuses. I want to care for these groups. Orphans especially. I need to stop making excuses and do something. No where in proverbs does it say "A righteous man sits around talking about what one ought to do, but never actually does it." No!! If anything it would say, "A righteous man knows when to act, but a fool makes excuses."
Is that in the Bible? huh...?
Lord, I pray You would take away my need and desire to make excuses. I pray that I would see a need and find a way to fill it. I pray that I would seek out opportunities to do good works instead of waiting for the opportunities to come to me. I pray that I would want to act and move and work. I pray I would have no fear, reasonable or otherwise. I pray You would leave me without excuse. Show me opportunities to share Your Word and feed Your lambs. Guide me in a righteous path.
Amen. Amen. Amen.
I don't think I've ever gone out and oppressed the poor or cheated them, etc. You probably haven't either. It's not something that normal people just do or even have the power to really do. I'm sure there's room for a political argument here, but I would feel that to be inappropriate and misjudged. One thing that has bothered me recently is my lack of willingness to go out and be with the poor. To help them where they are. To spend time with them in order to share the Gospel with them. I do get caught up in my own life - where I'm going, what I need to be doing, etc. I tend to forget that my life isn't all that important.
For example, I was in Washington DC last week on vacation. I was somewhat overwhelmed by the number of panhandlers there were on the streets. Now I've heard my fair share of stories about these people who make a pretty good living begging for money on the streets. It still bothers me though. I will never just leave money and walk away. That's not what Jesus would have done, so I see no reason to do something so ridiculous. Yet how can I as a young woman stop and talk to a somewhat shadey man on the side of the road. But how can I just do nothing? Evidently it's quite easy, because nothing is exactly what I did. I walked right past all of those people. What would they say about my God if they knew I was a Christian?
This is why it gets to me. As Christians, we aren't called to do much. But some of the big things are to spread the Good News and care for the widows, orphans, and the needy. Granted you can't always tell what someone is truly in need of, but you can't just assume they are lying.
So what am I supposed to do? I know places to go, things to do, people to work with in order to achieve this commission. But I'm busy. Oh I don't have time this week. No, I can't go alone. Excuses, Excuses. I want to care for these groups. Orphans especially. I need to stop making excuses and do something. No where in proverbs does it say "A righteous man sits around talking about what one ought to do, but never actually does it." No!! If anything it would say, "A righteous man knows when to act, but a fool makes excuses."
Is that in the Bible? huh...?
Lord, I pray You would take away my need and desire to make excuses. I pray that I would see a need and find a way to fill it. I pray that I would seek out opportunities to do good works instead of waiting for the opportunities to come to me. I pray that I would want to act and move and work. I pray I would have no fear, reasonable or otherwise. I pray You would leave me without excuse. Show me opportunities to share Your Word and feed Your lambs. Guide me in a righteous path.
Amen. Amen. Amen.
05 June 2012
Anxiety
Anxiety in a man's heart wears him down, but a good word makes him glad.
I long for these good words and seek them out. When I am most anxious, then I am most hungry for Your Word and Teachings. When I am uncertain or stressed, the only place I can find reprieve is in the Word. That is how I came upon the radio station I listen to. I was going through the worst of it, and I need more than just a superficial Christian radio station in the car. I needed something with meat and potatoes. I found this station that not only has scripture-based music by awesome artists, but it also has scripture read over the airways and teachings from well-known, godly people. It's such a blessing to listen to during my commute, and I'm so glad God reminded me of its existence.
This is what we have to do when anxiety comes around. I'm very familiar with anxiety. Short of actually have some sort of mental disorder, anxiety really plagues me. I worry about silly things too. It's not like I'm concerned about whether or not my friend will go to heaven if they die. No, that might be an acceptable form of anxiety. What I feel is anxiety over my future. Fear. I used to be afraid all the time. To the point I couldn't even sleep. Not afraid of real things, but whatever my mind could cook up. A robber outside my window. My life is somewhat void of real problems, but that doesn't mean the problems I have don't provide sufficient stress and anxiety. Praise the Lord I've been set free of the fear that I battled in middle school and high school. Praise the Lord He has offered me good words in the times of anxiety.
I worry about being good enough. I'm convinced that I am not alone among Christians. I'm referring to the so-called "life-long" Christians. None of us have been Christians all our lives, but it feels that way. We've grown up knowing that there is an impossible standard that we are supposed to reach. We spend the next 20 years or so on one of 2 paths: rebelling from that standard or feeling completely worthless because of it. We spend that time slowly learning that we really aren't supposed to ever get there. That God doesn't love us because of what we do. That God doesn't want us just when we make Him proud or when we live up to our potential. God wants us. period. All the time. If He expected us to be perfect He wouldn't have wasted His time sending His Son down to earth. If we were supposed to live up to the standard, then the old system would have worked out just fine. We could have all just gone to hell for our sins and that would have been that. But that's not what happened. God saw we would never live up, so He made a way for us to be with Him. We still have to be flawless to enter His presence, but when He looks at me now, He doesn't see my mistakes because they have been forgiven and promptly forgotten. What I've done doesn't matter near as much as what I will do. God doesn't care about where we are coming from near as much as where we are going. He wants us to change and to start obeying the Law of Righteousness which He has given us through His Spirit. It's not a list of do's and don'ts but rather a guide to the Kingdom. To where God is and what needs to be done.
I say all this as if I am some sort of expert. HA! Have I ever acted in a way that is worthy of the name Christian? See what I mean about not feeling good enough. I look at myself and see nothing but short-comings. Praise be to God who can look past them.
Lord, I pray that You would help me see past my short-comings and rely on You to fill in the gaps. Help me to be like Paul who rejoiced in his short-comings, weakenesses, and failures. I want to live a life devoted to You and free from anxieties, fears, and worries. Let the Truth that I know permeate into my thoughts and actions. Let Your Word be ever on my lips and ever in my heart. Teach me. Guide me in the way everlasting. Most of all, take away the lie that it matters that I am not good enough. Of course I'm not! But Praise be to You, Lord, that You are more than enough!!!
AMEN! AMEN! AMEN!
I long for these good words and seek them out. When I am most anxious, then I am most hungry for Your Word and Teachings. When I am uncertain or stressed, the only place I can find reprieve is in the Word. That is how I came upon the radio station I listen to. I was going through the worst of it, and I need more than just a superficial Christian radio station in the car. I needed something with meat and potatoes. I found this station that not only has scripture-based music by awesome artists, but it also has scripture read over the airways and teachings from well-known, godly people. It's such a blessing to listen to during my commute, and I'm so glad God reminded me of its existence.
This is what we have to do when anxiety comes around. I'm very familiar with anxiety. Short of actually have some sort of mental disorder, anxiety really plagues me. I worry about silly things too. It's not like I'm concerned about whether or not my friend will go to heaven if they die. No, that might be an acceptable form of anxiety. What I feel is anxiety over my future. Fear. I used to be afraid all the time. To the point I couldn't even sleep. Not afraid of real things, but whatever my mind could cook up. A robber outside my window. My life is somewhat void of real problems, but that doesn't mean the problems I have don't provide sufficient stress and anxiety. Praise the Lord I've been set free of the fear that I battled in middle school and high school. Praise the Lord He has offered me good words in the times of anxiety.
I worry about being good enough. I'm convinced that I am not alone among Christians. I'm referring to the so-called "life-long" Christians. None of us have been Christians all our lives, but it feels that way. We've grown up knowing that there is an impossible standard that we are supposed to reach. We spend the next 20 years or so on one of 2 paths: rebelling from that standard or feeling completely worthless because of it. We spend that time slowly learning that we really aren't supposed to ever get there. That God doesn't love us because of what we do. That God doesn't want us just when we make Him proud or when we live up to our potential. God wants us. period. All the time. If He expected us to be perfect He wouldn't have wasted His time sending His Son down to earth. If we were supposed to live up to the standard, then the old system would have worked out just fine. We could have all just gone to hell for our sins and that would have been that. But that's not what happened. God saw we would never live up, so He made a way for us to be with Him. We still have to be flawless to enter His presence, but when He looks at me now, He doesn't see my mistakes because they have been forgiven and promptly forgotten. What I've done doesn't matter near as much as what I will do. God doesn't care about where we are coming from near as much as where we are going. He wants us to change and to start obeying the Law of Righteousness which He has given us through His Spirit. It's not a list of do's and don'ts but rather a guide to the Kingdom. To where God is and what needs to be done.
I say all this as if I am some sort of expert. HA! Have I ever acted in a way that is worthy of the name Christian? See what I mean about not feeling good enough. I look at myself and see nothing but short-comings. Praise be to God who can look past them.
Lord, I pray that You would help me see past my short-comings and rely on You to fill in the gaps. Help me to be like Paul who rejoiced in his short-comings, weakenesses, and failures. I want to live a life devoted to You and free from anxieties, fears, and worries. Let the Truth that I know permeate into my thoughts and actions. Let Your Word be ever on my lips and ever in my heart. Teach me. Guide me in the way everlasting. Most of all, take away the lie that it matters that I am not good enough. Of course I'm not! But Praise be to You, Lord, that You are more than enough!!!
AMEN! AMEN! AMEN!
04 June 2012
The Fear of the Lord
The fear of the Lord is the beginning of wisdom.
How to accept wisdom has always been a burning question in my life. How on earth am I supposed to lay hold of something so elusive? I realize now that I am not entirely foolish because much like the first verse I quoted says, loving the Lord is where wisdom starts. But how does it continue? Where do I go next? To the Word of course. Eating it up like a box of Cheez-its. I try to do that. And I do feel wiser. But I still long for more. I guess I'm hoping for too much wisdom. I want to be wise enough to have no doubts what the best path is for me or anyone that I am advising. I don't think I'm supposed to be that wise. I think that's God's job.
This doesn't mean I should stop hunting for wisdom. I'm hungry for more of You, Lord. I feel like I so easily slip off into whatever-land and lose sight of what I ought to be doing. I just went through what was mostly likely the toughest year of my life. I have never felt so much - I don't even know how to describe the feeling. It was torture. But it's over. I am a seasoned 2nd year teacher who hopefully will get her act together.
Which brings me to a more pressing issue - did I make the right decision signing up for a second year? I have felt nothing but anxiety about this question since, oh I don't know, January. Was I supposed to? I have had moments where I have been absolutely positive that you want me back there, but then I have moments of complete, overwhelming anxiety. I was suspicious that I was never supposed to take this job to begin with. Now I'm suspicious that a second year is a bad idea too. This is when I long for more wisdom than I have. But I believe I can discern pretty well, and I'm pretty sure that anxiety is never from the Lord. Ever. Ergo these feelings are not from God. Even when we make the "wrong" choice, it's not like God's going to let us live with regret and anxiety as we suffer the consequences. That's not really His style. If we make the "wrong" choice, he's still working for our good. Somehow, even if it is painful, He'll get us back on track. And we'll be stronger for it. As long as we keep trusting. I trust that I made the decision he called me to make. If I'm wrong - too late now. If I'm right - maybe that will make this year better. Right or wrong - God will be with me every step.
This gives me the confidence and strength to look forward to August without longing for 2013. I do not want to spend another year wishing my days away becuase I just want it to end. No. That is no way to live. God has called me to a life of Joy and Fullness. Though I never stopped feeling His Joy, I don't want to feel so stressed and tortured. Mostly I need to get over this self-pity thing.
His Joy is so rich. I was never without a desire to walk around with a stupid grin on my face because whatever was going on was either ironic or funny or I just couldn't help remembering how much the Lord loves me. Yes there were moments were I was livid with anger, but God's Joy is what calmed me. I may lack many of the spiritual fruits, but I have never been without Joy. Praise be to God.
Oh Lord Father! I ask this day that You fill me with wisdom and insight to see where You are moving and follow without doubt. I pray that my desire would not be for men or food or recognition but only for You. I pray that I would be busy with Kingdom Busy. I pray that I would not limit myself to whatever profession I hold, but that I would define myself as a laborer in Your vineyard: Preparing the way of the Lord. Let me speak with Your words and move with Your heart. I pray that I might fade away as You shine through. Let me never be without fear of You. Let my hope always be firm in You. Let me not fail even when I cannot see. Let my desire be for Your Kingdom. Let me heart feel as Yours does. Let good enough never be enough. No longer I but Christ who lives in me.
Amen. Amen. Amen.
How to accept wisdom has always been a burning question in my life. How on earth am I supposed to lay hold of something so elusive? I realize now that I am not entirely foolish because much like the first verse I quoted says, loving the Lord is where wisdom starts. But how does it continue? Where do I go next? To the Word of course. Eating it up like a box of Cheez-its. I try to do that. And I do feel wiser. But I still long for more. I guess I'm hoping for too much wisdom. I want to be wise enough to have no doubts what the best path is for me or anyone that I am advising. I don't think I'm supposed to be that wise. I think that's God's job.
This doesn't mean I should stop hunting for wisdom. I'm hungry for more of You, Lord. I feel like I so easily slip off into whatever-land and lose sight of what I ought to be doing. I just went through what was mostly likely the toughest year of my life. I have never felt so much - I don't even know how to describe the feeling. It was torture. But it's over. I am a seasoned 2nd year teacher who hopefully will get her act together.
Which brings me to a more pressing issue - did I make the right decision signing up for a second year? I have felt nothing but anxiety about this question since, oh I don't know, January. Was I supposed to? I have had moments where I have been absolutely positive that you want me back there, but then I have moments of complete, overwhelming anxiety. I was suspicious that I was never supposed to take this job to begin with. Now I'm suspicious that a second year is a bad idea too. This is when I long for more wisdom than I have. But I believe I can discern pretty well, and I'm pretty sure that anxiety is never from the Lord. Ever. Ergo these feelings are not from God. Even when we make the "wrong" choice, it's not like God's going to let us live with regret and anxiety as we suffer the consequences. That's not really His style. If we make the "wrong" choice, he's still working for our good. Somehow, even if it is painful, He'll get us back on track. And we'll be stronger for it. As long as we keep trusting. I trust that I made the decision he called me to make. If I'm wrong - too late now. If I'm right - maybe that will make this year better. Right or wrong - God will be with me every step.
This gives me the confidence and strength to look forward to August without longing for 2013. I do not want to spend another year wishing my days away becuase I just want it to end. No. That is no way to live. God has called me to a life of Joy and Fullness. Though I never stopped feeling His Joy, I don't want to feel so stressed and tortured. Mostly I need to get over this self-pity thing.
His Joy is so rich. I was never without a desire to walk around with a stupid grin on my face because whatever was going on was either ironic or funny or I just couldn't help remembering how much the Lord loves me. Yes there were moments were I was livid with anger, but God's Joy is what calmed me. I may lack many of the spiritual fruits, but I have never been without Joy. Praise be to God.
Oh Lord Father! I ask this day that You fill me with wisdom and insight to see where You are moving and follow without doubt. I pray that my desire would not be for men or food or recognition but only for You. I pray that I would be busy with Kingdom Busy. I pray that I would not limit myself to whatever profession I hold, but that I would define myself as a laborer in Your vineyard: Preparing the way of the Lord. Let me speak with Your words and move with Your heart. I pray that I might fade away as You shine through. Let me never be without fear of You. Let my hope always be firm in You. Let me not fail even when I cannot see. Let my desire be for Your Kingdom. Let me heart feel as Yours does. Let good enough never be enough. No longer I but Christ who lives in me.
Amen. Amen. Amen.
28 April 2012
08 April 2012
Here it is!
The beauty of the Cross is that it's not the end of the story. I'm sure that line has been repeated throughout history, but that doesn't make it less true. Resurrection Sunday is the holiday for me. The only day worth celebrating. This day said, "Hey Death, you just lost! Sin, forget it! Your slaves have been freed!" It's like the Emancipation Proclamation times a billion. We none of us are slaves anymore! I don't know if you ever felt enslaved, but I have. When a sin becomes a constant patterns without end, that is slavery. Until you claim the Victory and Freedom that the Cross and the Empty Tomb offer, you will continue to be enslaved.
I have been set free because God is alive!
This is why this topic is the subject of so many songs. This is what people can't understand. We are dead in sin until we take Jesus at His Word, embrace His Promises and live in Freedom!
I count everything else as lost compared to the surpassing joy that comes from Christ Jesus. Why would I choose anything else? Why would I live in bondage and misery when I can choose freedom and joy? Too much emotion and not enough words. This post is rightly short...
Lord, in spite of myself, I pray that You would help me to live in the Freedom You've so freely given and help me to see Your Mighty Hand outstretched in Victory. I praise You for the Cross. I praise You that the tomb is still empty. Amen Amen Amen
I have been set free because God is alive!
This is why this topic is the subject of so many songs. This is what people can't understand. We are dead in sin until we take Jesus at His Word, embrace His Promises and live in Freedom!
I count everything else as lost compared to the surpassing joy that comes from Christ Jesus. Why would I choose anything else? Why would I live in bondage and misery when I can choose freedom and joy? Too much emotion and not enough words. This post is rightly short...
Lord, in spite of myself, I pray that You would help me to live in the Freedom You've so freely given and help me to see Your Mighty Hand outstretched in Victory. I praise You for the Cross. I praise You that the tomb is still empty. Amen Amen Amen
07 April 2012
Where is the Victory?
It seemed like Death had won. And Death had won. Jesus was dead. Not just thought to be dead but genuinely no longer a part of the living. There are so many perspectives and so many ways to view these days, my favorite days. The most holy of days if you ask me. There's Friday: the day when the most perfect thing to ever be on this Earth said "I am going to let you kill me because I love you. Your sin must be paid for. You cannot do it on your own. You will never know my Father if there is no sacrifice. I will be your sacrifice. Not because I'm guilty. Not because you earned it. No. Because I have been a part of the plan from the beginning. I am changing the parameters."
Friday redefined the world, but Sunday changed history.
But what about Saturday - the Sabbath. Having no choice but to sit around and feel defeated. Though Jesus left the disciples with the promise of resurrection, they didn't know what He was talking about. Maybe some did. I like to think John did, but in reality, they all had scattered and were only meeting to discuss how they could avoid getting captured and killed. Too bad nobody's interested in the disciple of a defeated savior.
Too bad He wasn't defeated.
Jesus meanwhile was in hell. Suffering still for us. Living the punishment. Away from the Father. Can you imagine? Knowing all the Good and all the Evil, He choose to subject Himself to the evil. How many angels could and would have taken His place? How many did? None. Jesus, Creator of everything, became a victim to all the evil this world has to offer. From my experience, that is a lot. I can't even imagine.
Praise the Lord!!
I don't want to make light of the resurrection by focusing on the Cross. Nor do I want to make light of the Cross by focusing on Sunday.
That's why I said: Friday redefined the world, but Sunday changed history.
Until Good Friday, nobody's god had ever been that loving and that good. That wasn't even imaginable. We can imagine it because we live on this side. But then, Islam didn't even exist really. Mythology was fun of vengeful gods out to play tricks. There was no such thing as a loving God. Even the Jews didn't fully grasp that God would, could or should die for them. This is how Jesus redefined the parameters.
Then on Sunday, the completely changed the world. He changed history. It went from battle to victory. No longer were we subject to sin but Love had won!!!
Hallelujah!
Lord, praise You for what You did on Friday. What I could never repay. Praise You that you fulfilled all the promises and didn't leave a single one undone. There is so much Hope in Your promises!!!
Amen Amen Amen
Friday redefined the world, but Sunday changed history.
But what about Saturday - the Sabbath. Having no choice but to sit around and feel defeated. Though Jesus left the disciples with the promise of resurrection, they didn't know what He was talking about. Maybe some did. I like to think John did, but in reality, they all had scattered and were only meeting to discuss how they could avoid getting captured and killed. Too bad nobody's interested in the disciple of a defeated savior.
Too bad He wasn't defeated.
Jesus meanwhile was in hell. Suffering still for us. Living the punishment. Away from the Father. Can you imagine? Knowing all the Good and all the Evil, He choose to subject Himself to the evil. How many angels could and would have taken His place? How many did? None. Jesus, Creator of everything, became a victim to all the evil this world has to offer. From my experience, that is a lot. I can't even imagine.
Praise the Lord!!
I don't want to make light of the resurrection by focusing on the Cross. Nor do I want to make light of the Cross by focusing on Sunday.
That's why I said: Friday redefined the world, but Sunday changed history.
Until Good Friday, nobody's god had ever been that loving and that good. That wasn't even imaginable. We can imagine it because we live on this side. But then, Islam didn't even exist really. Mythology was fun of vengeful gods out to play tricks. There was no such thing as a loving God. Even the Jews didn't fully grasp that God would, could or should die for them. This is how Jesus redefined the parameters.
Then on Sunday, the completely changed the world. He changed history. It went from battle to victory. No longer were we subject to sin but Love had won!!!
Hallelujah!
Lord, praise You for what You did on Friday. What I could never repay. Praise You that you fulfilled all the promises and didn't leave a single one undone. There is so much Hope in Your promises!!!
Amen Amen Amen
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